Friday, August 6, 2010

LIVING IN THE NOW (and Book Giveaway!)

by Dee Davis

Been thinking about interesting people of late. The things others do that make me wish I was doing that too. I suspect that lives viewed from the outside always seem more exciting than they are. I know when someone introduces me to speak and I hear all the stuff I’ve done, I always wonder who the speaker is –oh…me.

It’s so easy it seems to let our lives get sidetracked into “what ifs” –instead of “I haves”. Our pasts have a way of dictating our present. And some (me included) can let that paralyze them into losing self-esteem, which is hard enough to come by in the first place. Conversely there are also people who are ruled by the future. Must do this, must do that, and all of it before I reach a certain age or it just won’t count. Again, I find that I am prone to this particular human weakness. I often think why didn’t I start writing earlier in my life, then I’d be like so and so. (Another trap we often set for ourselves – contrast and comparison).

But you know the truth is the only moment that counts is the now. It’s the only one we can be sure of. And I think we need to put or focus on that -- On living each second as if it were the most important one. And overanalyzing the past or the future only wastes the precious minutes we spend doing it. If opportunity knocks, you won’t be able to hear it if you’re having a pity party or a planning session. Better to wait, ready for whatever it is life holds in store, and then grab it with gusto.

I’ve always said that my only goal in life is to die without regret. That’s a tall order, I know, but I think it helps me to keep focus, to make sure that when I feel overwhelmed and overshadowed, I can pull myself out of the dark and step into the light—one of my own making.

I think in DESPERATE DEEDS, my latest A-Tac book, that’s the lesson Tyler Hanson has to learn. She’s got to understand that there are no promises, no guarantees. Sometimes you just have to jump off the cliff, feet first, and have a little faith that things will turn out all right.

And of course what I love about romance novels is that the leap is almost always worth it. But the funny thing is, that I also find it’s true in life. Sometimes you wind up a little beat up for the journey, but in the end, there’s usually something that happens that enriches the path we’re on.

Clearly, I’m having a pensive day! What about you guys? Do you live in the future, the past or the now? Maybe there’s something to be said for all three?

For more on DESPERATE DEEDS check out

Leave a comment on this blog for Dee and you will be entered to win a free copy of DESPERATE DEEDS.  Winner will be announced on Friday, August 13.  Good luck.

On the brink of turning forty, award winning author Dee Davis realized that life only happens once. In total panic, she decided it was time to stop talking about writing a book and “just do it”. To that end she sat down at the computer and hasn’t left since. The transplanted Texan now lives in Manhattan. The time she doesn’t spend writing is spent with her husband, her daughter, her cat and her Cardigan Welsh Corgi. Visit her online at


  1. Sometimes, I do dwell on the past or worry about the future, but living in the present is what I'm trying to do. It is easy to slide into wondering about the what-if's of the past or future, but, as you so eloquently point out, the present moment is the only one we can be sure of and do something about. Great blog post on focusing on the present! Karen K.

  2. I love reflecting on the past. I could talk "remember when..." with friends or family for a good long time. There's joy in shared experiences. But, I try to live for the moment and plan for the future, too. I'll take all three, past, present, future.

    I loved Dangerous Desires and can't wait to read Desperate Deeds!

  3. I enjoy looking back at the past, but I try to live in the present. I worry about the future endlessly!

  4. I live in the present which i believe is a gift.I rarely dwell on the past especially the sad memories.It makes me feel low and I am not sure why!Maybe because I am emotionally weak.And I hardly think of my future.A happy present is all i wish for.

  5. I try to live one day at a time. Sometimes I think about the past but; mostly I just think of what I'm doing today. Thank you for the giveaway.
    Sue b

  6. I try to learn from the past and look to the future. Some lessons are hard and some come easy but they are always lessons.

  7. Love the contemplative blog. I reflect on the past and try not to dwell in it. I take one day at a time, and enjoy taking side steps on occasion and "just do it for the hell of it." Yeah I have a few regrets, but as always 'if you didn't do this, you wouldn't have done that' tends to balance out the regrets. In other words, do it (whatever 'it' is) 'til you're satisfied!

  8. Great post Dee! I feel the same about wanting to die with no regrets. No regrets for things I didn't do, that is. Hard to avoid a few regrets for mistakes. But without those I wouldn't be where and who I am so the mistakes are even worth while. I tend to live in the future too much so my effort is to stop planning all the time and enjoy the moment. Thanks for the lovely, thoughtful post!

  9. I've taken to saying "live in the moment" over and over of late. But you know, I think it helps. And Karen totally agree... the road taken --no matter which one-- always has interesting things along the way -- many of them totally unexpected!

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