Wednesday, July 16, 2014


by Catherine Greenfeder


Do we have soul mates? How would we know them? Is it instant attraction, the unexplainable knowing of a person the first time you meet, karma, or all of these things?

According to the Urban Dictionary, a soul mate is “a person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet -- a connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved anyone prior.” In addition to this, “your soul mate understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of peace, calmness and happiness when you are around them. And when you are not around them, you are all that much more aware of the harshness of life, and how bonding with another person in this way is the most significant and satisfying thing you will experience in your lifetime. You are also all that much aware of the beauty in life, because you have been given a great gift and will always be thankful.”

As someone who enjoys reading and writing romance stories, this sounds like the perfect match of the hero and the heroine who are fated to be together. Yet, we know that life isn’t a romance novel, and love isn’t all smooth sailing. However, I think there is something to be said for the possibility of fated love and kindred spirits.

When I met my husband in high school, I felt a strong pull which felt beyond the normal hormonal rages and at­traction of late adolescence. It’s a connection that I still feel to this day, decades later, despite many changes and experiences.

In experiencing hypnotic past life regression, I encountered not only my husband in another lifetime but also other members of my family. It explained some of the relationships and issues I’ve encountered in the present lifetime.

This idea both fascinated me and inspired me to write about the possibilities of reincarnation and soul mates for my paranormal romance, SACRED FIRES, where the doomed lovers from ancient Aztec Mexico are reunited in present day Mexico to solve a mystery, pay a karmic debt, and fall in love again. I have also used the idea as snippets in other books including my recent young adult novel, A KISS OUT OF TIME. Although that is pri­marily a ghost story featuring a psychic teen, there is mention of finding one’s soul mate when Georgina, the teenage psychic, considers her own romantic involvement with fellow ghost hunter and best friend Jake.

I’m not sure how it happens, but I’ve come to believe in the possibility of soul mates or fated love as well as the concept of kindred spirits, people who once knew each other and have a strong but not romantic connection from another lifetime. I’ve witnessed this with friends who feel more like brothers or sisters, and perhaps they were in some other lifetime, which might provide material for future stories.

So, if you ever wonder about feeling an instant attraction or an immediate dislike to someone upon first meeting them without any logical explanation, you might consider the notion of fate, karma, and soul mates. You might also consider it for your own story ideas.  Happy writing!♥


Catherine Greenfeder is the author of four published novels including SACRED FIRES, ANGELS AMONG US, WILDFLOWERS, and A KISS OUT OF TIME. She is currently working on a sequel to her young adult novel and a woman’s mainstream fiction book.