We are talking Self-Sabotage this week.
Join us as authors Maria Cox and Alexis Daria
give us their take on the subject.
Do you ask
yourself, what keeps me from meeting my goals? Why do others achieve theirs
successfully? Most of us have goals, big and small, but the most realistic
goals in the world won’t materialize if you engage in self-defeating behaviors.
So, what is
self-sabotage?
“Self-sabotage is
when we say we want something and then go about making sure it doesn't happen.”
~ Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby
In today’s
business environment we’re “on” all the time. All eyes are on us to achieve or
fail. It’s important that we don’t give in to negative feelings and risk
spiraling out of control.
If you’re
self-sabotaging you’re not alone. Studies suggest that 85 percent of people
engage in some form of self-sabotage.
Below are two of
the most common behaviors:
“If only…”
We all have some
regrets, whether they're about something we did (if only I hadn't dropped out
of college), or something we didn't do (if only I’d ask for that raise). To
dwell on these “if only” fantasies will only keep you idling in neutral.
The
“worry wart”
You
fret over things that really shouldn't matter. You fear that if you fail others
will think less of you. You doubt your abilities even though “you’re very
capable”. Listen, we all have insecurities; we just have to learn to manage
them effectively.
Here
are a few things that experts suggest we practice in order to minimize the
self-deprecating inner talk:
Smile
more
Smile.
Right now
Emit
good energy
The
energy you send out into the world comes back.
Do
for others
If
you’re wallowing in your own misery, why not pull aside and regroup? Focusing
on others is a great way to gain perspective.
See
the bright side
Remember
that the universe is in balance. Things aren’t always as bad as they seem.
Get
grounded and stay grounded
Positive
thinking without positive actions gets you nowhere. Be prepared to do the work.
Laugh
Especially
at yourself!
Anytime
you feel like your plan has gone off course, fight against shutting down. If
you get a bad review, don’t throw in the towel. Before you give up on your
strategy, before you decide to give up on your dream, sit down and plan a new
approach.♥
Maria
Cox is a PRO member of Romance Writers of America; she has also served as
President of the Phoenix Writers Club. Maria has been writing stories since she
was a young girl. She picked up her first romance novel when she was just
eleven years old and has loved the genre ever since. Maria writes sensual
romance, stories that showcase strong, sassy, and sexy characters. When not
writing fiction, Maria works as a technical writer. She lives in Queens, New
York. Please visit her site www.mariacox.net and/or follow her on Twitter.
COME BACK TOMORROW AS AUTHOR ALEXIS DARIA
TALKS ABOUT SELF-SABOTAGE AND PLAYING SMALL.
READ ROMANCE!
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